Wednesday, 16 January 2013

A Joke a day keeps the doctor away! (16-01-13)




Years ago while on my matriculation groove, the ‘staylites’ (as opposed to the Jambites) were singing: “Matriculation nor be convocation; matriculation nor be convocation; matriculation nor be convocation; somebody go kpai.” At that time I felt: “Who cares? Let’s celebrate today’s joys and face tomorrow’s problems when it comes.” Anyways, years later I understood the full meaning of that song. ‘No be small thing o.’

‘See, na joke! I nor dey oh.’ There was this guy, he was a staylite. He had a younger brother who was a Jambite. They went to a convocation ceremony together. Before they left home, they agreed on a code of communication:

1st class degree = I too know
2nd class upper degree = I pass them
2nd class lower degree = I am loyal
3rd class degree = I don’t care
Pass = I was there
Fail = The Devil is a liar.

When they got to the ceremony, they went inside the Auditorium.
Jambite pointed to some guys grinning from molar to molar, Staylite said: ‘I too know.’

Jambite pointed to some sitting close to the podium, Staylite: ‘I pass them.’

Jambite looked behind him, Staylite: ‘I am loyal.’

Finally, they came out. Jambite saw so many people with convocation gowns standing outside taking pictures and partying. Jambite: ‘Why are they standing outside when the actual ceremony is going on inside? Staylite: ‘I don’t care.’

Not long after that they heard some guys with convocation gowns whining about the lecturers and administrative staffs that who took part in a procession in and out of the hall. Staylite introduced them as the ‘I was there’ crew.

At the back of the Auditorium, Jambite saw a group of boys and girls. They were praying, singing, binding, and exorcising. Jambite pointed at them. Staylite: ‘Stop staring at them. The Devil is a liar.’

A word a day … (16-01-13)!



Looking good is good practice but doing just as well or even better in other areas of your life is good living!

Jokes in Pidgin English (13)



Mr Lecturer!
Those days 4 school, e get one lecturer for Engineering wen dey like to set hard hard questions for exams. U know those kind of lecturers wen dey use example for textbook teach, but wen exam reach na the exercise dey go use take set questions. Students dey complain well well about d lecturer. One day, after one exam, the Dean of Engineering come call d Lecturer enter em office. He come give am seat, give am the question paper wen d lecturer use take set d exam, give am biro and paper, set clock to time am, d Dean say, ‘oya, answer your questions in the allocated time.’ Simple thing! Na u set these questions, u na answer d questions? O boy, na so d lecturer dey sweat like who dem pour water for him body. E nor fit answer d questions in d allocated time. Abeg, Mr. Lecturer make who na dey pity students naa, set questions wen your children fit anwer naaa. Biko! Mr. Lecturer Laho (please)!

IN THEIR GRIEF, THEY FOUND A COURSE – PARALYZED BUT NOT OUT! (GRIEF SERIES REDACTED VOL. 5)




Can you walk around freely, jump or hop around without pains or stress? Do you know how valuable it is to move around effortlessly with your legs? Have you hurt you foot before and then suddenly you move around sluggishly with pains? I guess you won’t be so bothered because when the injury heals, you can freely move around again. But does that not give you a glimpse of what it feels like when an able-bodied grown man suddenly finds it difficult or impossible to walk around as result of an illness or an accident? How scary the thought would be that this is not a temporary injury but a permanent life-altering disability? How aggrieved would it be if one suddenly finds out that he or she can’t just stroll around anymore and that he or she have to move around with a wheelchair or the with aid of prosthesis or arm supports! Would that be the end of the world? How have some individuals in the past dealt with their paralysis? In their grief over the loss of some or all of the functions of their limbs, did they find more reason to live and to make a difference and to leave this world a better place than they met it? Let’s begin:

In Their Grief, They found a Course – The Story of John C. Hockenberry!

John Charles Hockenberry was born on June 4, 1956. At the age of 19 when he was an undergraduate student, he was in a vehicle that got involved in a gruesome accident. He sustained spinal cord injury that left him paralyzed with loss of sensation and voluntary movement from his mid-chest down. He later took interest in broadcasting and journalism. In spite of the limitations of been in a wheelchair, he became so proficient in his career. He worked in major broadcasting networks like ABC and NBC. He covered the Persian Gulf War in 1991 and 1992. He covered the civil war in Somalia and the early days of the al-Qaeda in Afghanistan. He’s written well-acclaimed books, articles, and documentaries. He’s written for major newspapers in the US like The New York Times and The Washington Post. He’s also fought for the rights of disabled people by championing their course and representing them in The White House and United Nations. In the course of his career, he’s won many awards: four-time Emmy Award winner (the Emmy is the TV equivalent of the Oscars and Grammy Awards) and three-time Peabody Award winner (Peabody awards is more for radio broadcasting). He’s married with children: two sets of twins and a boy. The essence of this story is: in spite of his obvious disabilities, he did not give up. He undertook a career that was challenging even for able-bodied individuals and he excelled. He reported in war zones, not just in the comfort of an office. He raised a family. He used his position as a prominent individual in the disabled community to fight for the rights and interests of the disabled. When interviewed about one of his books, he said:

‘It was a memoir about my accident and right after it and how I got into radio and sort of the discoveries I [made] along the way of how being physically different turned out to be an advantage in strange sorts of ways and the kinds of things that you're motivated to do when you feel like you're different and have to overcompensate and how ridiculous sometimes those things can be.’ – He was interviewed by Linda Richards on January Magazine (januarymagazine.com)

Franklin Delano Roosevelt

He was the 32nd President of the United States. Before he became President of the US, he suffered from a paralytic illness which left him with permanent paralysis from the waist down. While he used a wheelchair in private, on public functions, he used iron braces that fitted his hips and legs. In spite of his limitations, he was the longest serving American President. He won four elections to serve as President. He led America through some of its worst crises in history: The Great Depression and The Second World War. He traveled the length and breadth of the earth to attend conferences that formulated strategies to end World War II. He died in 1945 while serving his fourth term as President. He’s been ranked the third best President in American history after George Washington and Abraham Lincoln. In spite of his disabilities, he led his nation through thick and thin. Imagine the grief felt in America after the Japanese invasion and destruction of Pearl Harbor in 1941. But the man in the wheels showed no sign of weakness; he courageously stood up to give a famous speech to Congress and declared an act of war! As President, he helped formed the National Foundation for Infantile Paralysis (the March of Dimes). He’s quoted as saying the following:
‘The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.’
‘When you get to the end of the rope. Tie a knot and hang on.’
‘Happiness is not in the mere possession of money; it lies in the joy of achievement, in the thrill of creative effort.’
‘Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the assessment that something else is more important than fear.’ – Quotes sourced from www.goodreads.com

Arthur C. Guyton

Arthur Clifton Guyton is a household name in the world of medicine. He’s well known for his book: Guyton’s Textbook of Medical Physiology. He attended the University of Mississippi and Harvard Medical School. It’s reported that he wanted to be a cardiovascular surgeon. But in the final year of his residency training, he had poliomyelitis disease. As a result of the disease, he suffered paralysis in his right leg, left arm, and both shoulders. That interrupted his training and he spent months to recuperate. Faced with the challenge of partial paralysis and limited mobility, he built the “first motorized wheelchair controlled by a ‘joy stick,’ motorized hoists for lifting patients, special leg braces, and other devices to aid the handicapped.” He abandoned the pursuit of been a surgeon and devoted himself to teaching and research. He later became the head of the Department of Physiology in the University of Mississippi. He excelled in his research efforts and he brought a lot of new insights in the field of physiology and for which he received many awards. He was an accomplished Professor who taught many students for over 50 years, many of whom later became professionals in their own rights. Unlike other major medical textbooks, which often had many authors, the first 8 editions of his book, Guyton’s Textbook of Medical physiology were written entirely by him. He and the wife raised ten children and they are all doctors. 8 of his children graduated from Harvard Medical School, one from Duke Medical School, and one from University of Miami Medical School after receiving a PhD from Harvard. Among his children, there is a Professor of Ophthalmology, a Professor of Surgery, a Professor of Medicine, a Cardiothoracic Surgeon, a Rheumatologist, two Anaesthiologists and two Orthopaedic Surgeons. The success he had in raising his children was related to his philosophy of ‘learn by doing.’ Even with his disabilities, everything in his house from swimming pool, sail boats to electric home gadgets were all constructed by him and his children. It’s reported that he repaired leaks and faulty household equipment himself even when it would have been a lot easier to invite a repairman. He died in a car accident in 2003. It’s unbelievable that a man who used crutches and a wheelchair would achieve all these feats. He’s quoted as saying:
‘If you need it and it doesn't exist, invent it.’
(Specifics of the above stories were sourced from Google.com and Wikipedia.com)

On a final note in this series, let me say I find all the above stories very personal. I was born and raised for much of my formative years by a paraplegic father. Yes, the late Mr. Moses Ojirigho was an able-bodied man who was born with his full bodily functions. He was a promising young man when he suddenly fell ill to a terrible disease that left him paralyzed from his waist down. He sought treatment for so many years all to no avail. In spite of his limitations, he didn’t give up. He was resilient. He was hopeful. He was hard-working I was born to meet him in his paraplegic state but I don’t know many able-bodied men who could courageously do the things he did. He taught me a lot. The most important lesson I learnt from him is the value of endurance. His life was the epitome of patience, endurance and perseverance. I’m Dr. Eugene A. Ojirigho, the proud son of a paraplegic father and I have nothing to be ashamed of about that. In grief, he stood tall even though literally he could not stand on his own. I lost him years ago, but he’s my hero any day, a great dad who gave it all in spite of all the odds. My dad loved writing down his thoughts in colourful words. If I'm any good in writing, i'm nothing, i'm just being the true son of my father. My father once told me, ‘You don’t forget the things that are most important to you.’ There is power in grief. Loss of a loved one does not mean the end of the world. Loss of sight or hearing or loss of the ability to walk does not make you less human. It does not stop you from reaching your goals. Rather such loss could inspire you to greater heights. Yes, in grief and sorrow, we can all find a purposeful and productive course of life. To all those who lost loved ones in the ill-fated Dana flight, I say, ‘don’t give up.’ Be resolved to lead a more rewarding life that your loved ones would be proud of were they alive to see you. Thanks for your patience and love in reading this rather long article. Stay safe! Peace!

P.S. This is the last of the series: In their Grief, They Found a Course! I wrote it for the memories of those who lost their lives in the tragic Dana Airline plane crash in Lagos on the 3rd of June, 2012. May all who've lost loved ones at one time or another find a course worthy of the memory of those whom they've lost! – Dr. Eugene A. O

Tuesday, 15 January 2013

A Thank-You Audio-Video Message on YouTube

COOL COLOUR CHOICES!!!

Our Choices are as many as there are Colours!

                                                                                              
                                                                                   
                                                                                    
                                                                                     
                                                                                   
                                                                                   
                                                                                  

From the moment we began to recognize colours as kids, we also began to make choices based on colours: 'i love red; blue is my colour; look at that purple dress, i love it.' That does not make one colour better than the other. It only reveals our personal preferences and choices. We cannot always explain our choices just as much as we cannot fully comprehend the existence of varying colours in the universe. We know that we don't necessarily need multiple colours to survive. But we need these beautiful colours to enjoy living. The Mastermind of Project Earth knows that humans need these colours: 'Let there be colours and there were colours.' Have you seen the picture of our planet from a space satellite? Oh, my God! Our supra-stellar Maker whose intelligence is light-years beyond our understanding created man with a free will: the ability to make choices. He made our senses with the ability to recognize varieties: our eyes see different colours; our ears hear different sounds just as we make different sounds with our mouth. Our nose can tell the difference even as our tongue can taste it. We can feel it. Wait a minute: What's the value of having the ability to make a choice if there aren't varieties to choose from? But He's the Alpha and the Omega. He knows it all. He created us to enjoy life responsibly and He also created the means for us to do so. Jehovah God did so in so many ways and in so many COLOURS!!!

A word a day … (15-01-13)!



Our happiness is not determined by the 

(material) worth of the things we own; 

rather our happiness is derived from the 

value we place on the things we own.