Jokes - Pastor too na human being!

On one fateful day, one commercial bus took off from a certain park and headed to a certain far away city. Inside the bus was a man who claims to be a pastor. He was ministering and doing every: he was reading from the bible; relating experiences of people he had helped through his bus route ministry; he was singing, praying, joking and doing everything to keep his audience focused on him. He said he has helped some passengers who were single to get married by helping them see their life partner who was a fellow passenger. That must have arisen the curiosity of the ‘all the single ladies, all the single ladies’ as sang by Beyonce. As the journey unfolded, the passengers heard that robbers were ahead. The bus driver had to stop and wait for other buses to come along. After a while, the passengers who initially came out of the bus and found an uncertain refuge in a nearby bush came out and entered the bus. As the driver was moving along, someone asked: ‘Where is the Pastor?’ The pastor was nowhere to be found. The guy just disappeared when he heard that certain human principalities were holding passengers to ransom with machine guns and AK-47s along the road. One would have thought he would cast and bind such principalities. Instead, he took off. Well, it’s succinct to say, ‘Pastor too na human being!’

There was this guy who went to a bear parlour to minister as a Man of God (MOG). When he got there, he started delivering his message. He was condemning the alcohol the men were drinking much to the annoyance of the owners of the ‘bear parlour.’ They waited for a while so that the Pastor would conclude his sermon. Unfortunately, the MOG kept on talking and talking and talking. To encourage him to leave, the waiters came up with a plan. They went to buy ‘Knockouts/banger/fireworks’. They went behind the pastor and threw a 'knockout' close to the MOG. Before you say Jack, MOG took off. He ran faster that Usain Bolt. Later in his church, he gave a testimony: ‘Praise the Lord, just the other day, I went to spread the message of the Lord in a bear parlour. I went to tell those men with carnal spirit that alcohol will take them to Hell. As I was ministering, someone threw a bomb close to where I was. The bomb was meant for me but as Baba was with me, no weapon fashioned against me will prosper. The bomb did not get to me. It went away from me and exploded some metres away from me. Glory to God! I’m safe. Hale and hearty!'

My people, ‘Pastor, too na human being. MOG see wetin pass am. He ma nor fit wait to know what really happened.’